Single White Candle
February of 2010…
Karen is standing in a small dark room in rural Ethiopia. She and her husband holding an unlit candle. On the opposite side of the room, they see the dim outline of a birth mother, cradling the flickering light of a single white candle.
The woman had walked for two days from her tiny African village to make one of the most excruciatingly difficult decisions any mother would ever have to make. In complete silence, she approached Karen and used the flame from her candle to light hers.
Then she blew out her own.
With that symbolic act, she transferred parental rights of her two-year-old son to a Texas couple who had traveled thousands of miles to adopt the boy. Through an interpreter, the birth mother shared her hopes and dreams for the son she had just given up. It was in that moment Karen’s life changed forever. With a single white candle, she committed herself to a lifelong mission to comfort and care for children who experience deeply rooted trauma.
“Tell me the facts and I’ll learn. Tell me the truth and I’ll believe. But tell me a story and it will live in heart forever” - NATIVE AMERICAN PROVERB
The child was born in a dirt floor hut. His mother had no one to help. No family. No medical staff. This Ethiopian woman did all that was required to give birth that day - completely and utterly on her own - as she welcomed her fifth child into a drought-prone, food-insecure world. Her tiny village lacks basics many take for granted such as groceries, running water, and health care. It wasn’t long before this beautiful newborn son became one mouth too many to feed.
At the time he was handed over to his adoptive parents, Noah had already endured more trauma than most ever will. His mother’s decision to walk over 300 kilometres from the hamlet of Aro Wegera to a care centre in Addis Ababa was packed with enough hurt in both their hearts to last a lifetime. Few can imagine the pain of watching a mother turn her back and return to four other hungry children while her son watches her leave him forever.
Fast forward to October of 2023…
Karen is in a room full of high-level business leaders in Dallas, TX. She is among nearly 20 people being challenged to tell their very own, honest-to-goodness unique, Signature Story. It’s the timeless story that explains anyone’s greater purpose. The story that reveals the real reason WHY they lead their respective organizations.
Faced with a blank sheet of paper and a 4-minute time limit, Karen’s thoughts drifted back to that memorable day when she and Tom welcomed Noah into their family. The more she scribbled, the more she jogged her own memory. She started recalling facts and moments lost along the way. In the days that followed, she experienced an epiphany comparable to one felt by a ducat-deprived Charlie in 19th century London, England.
Charlie needed cash and he needed it quick. Needed to conjure up an incredibly astounding idea that needed to stick. Needed a story that legions of readers would eagerly seek out and pick. With bank notes quickly coming due, would this latest fabrication do the trick?
In those grimy Industrial Revolution days, working on Christmas Day was just part of the normal routine. Working frantically to earn those extra shillings, Charlie burned through many late-night candles. Head down, he toiled through 16-hour days over six weeks to develop the characters of Ebenezer Scrooge, Bob Cratchit, Jacob Marley, Tiny Tim, and the Ghost of Christmas Past. The hastily conceived project was completed and shipped to the printers in the St. Nick of time. Charlie’s book sold like hotcakes. The message of “A Christmas Carol” spread like wildfire at a time when the sun never set on the British Empire.
When you tell a story that takes up permanent residence in someone’s soul, no one can predict how deeply it will move them. No one can forecast how far and wide that tale will travel. No one knows for certain what magic might be created through the sheer force of your words.
magic Can Be created through the sheer force of your words
A single story from Charles Dickens; the most famous novelist of the Victoria Age, is precisely how Christmas, as we know it, came to be. The beliefs of an entire planet forever changed through the fantastical and aspirational ideas of one man with a sturdy quill and an iron will. It was Charlie who single-handedly inspired holiday enchantment and sacred traditions we now enjoy.
The yuletide was not the creation of a corporation, university, or government. It didn’t come from a rock star, scientist, superstar athlete, celebrity, social media influencer, or advertising agency—just a committed writer, armed with a pen that is still mightier than any sword or algorithm.
Ink and Illumination: Unveiling Signature Stories from Dickens to Dallas
180 years later, Karen kept pushing her pen, crafting, shaping, editing, and refining her story of the Single White Candle. Once ready, she shared it with about 70 people at a recent all-staff meeting. When it was so well received, the story became the focus of the annual End of Year appeal at Dallas-based Vogel Alcove. Which has positively impacted over 17,000 homeless kids since 1987. What began with a small group of 15 children has blossomed into a comprehensive program steadily making a big difference in Big D. While Dallas boasts the 6th largest GDP of any American city, it’s also a town where more than 4,500 children will go to sleep tonight without a roof over their head.
You can readily see Karen’s commitment to this cause through the eyes of Noah.
After moving to America, the little boy learned how to speak English, play baseball, basketball, order McDonalds, watch movies, and play video games. He has also embraced pursuits such as piano, guitar, rock climbing, and longboarding. On the edge of seventeen, this high school junior intends to enroll at the Naval Academy with a dream of becoming an F-15 aviator.
When Noah’s head hits the pillow tonight, a framed photo of his Ethiopian mother, Alemitu, holds a prominent place on the bookshelf in his bedroom. Next to that photograph is the single white candle Karen and Tom brought with them and their little boy to America.
It serves as a constant, daily reminder.
For Noah, Karen, and Tom it may represent many things. To any reader, the single white candle might symbolize how there is still hope for families struggling to overcome the devasting effects of homelessness and poverty. How pain, anguish and trauma can be replaced by love, care and compassion.
The flame from a single story has the firepower to redefine your world. If you want to blaze a trail, you need to light the torch of your own story.
Two centuries ago, Charles Dickens toiled by the glow of candlelight to brighten a dark world. With no idea what a massive impact that small flame would make.
He just knew he had to damn well sit down and write about it.
Once basic needs such as food, shelter, and companionship are met, stories are what we still need most. Not trinkets, toys, tedious facts, or data. When you reflect on it, well-told stories like Karen’s become our very best instruction manuals memory aids, and moral compasses. As the incredibly talented J.K. Rowling of Harry Potter fame was once quoted as saying: “We do not need magic to transform our world. We carry all the power we need inside ourselves already.”
As you deck the halls, prepare for the holidays, and look forward to 2024, it is my hope the story of the Single White Candle is one you are willing to share with your friends and family. If Karen’s story has touched you in any way, you can let her know directly at KHughes@vogelalcove.org. Besides sharing a little brightness on your social media feed, what is it about the story of a Single White Candle that makes you reflect on your own Signature Story?
Could you plunge into the deep dark waters of your oceans of memories? Can you clearly articulate why you are committed to the work you do and the people you serve? Is there a story still inside you that needs to be told?
Strike the match.
Start a fire.
Watch the flames spread.
”All the darkness in the world can’t extinguish the light from one single candle”.
ST. FRANCIS OF ASSISI
p.s…. This is the final Leaders & Legends post for 2023 and in the spirit of the season, may there be many tidings of comfort and joy to carry you through to the New Year. If you need help with your Signature Story and how it can become core to your brand strategy, we’re always happy to have a conversation. One option you may want to explore is the BIG LITTLE LEGENDS MASTERCLASS; ideal for small companies and solopreneurs who want to make a make a splash in their market. Click here and we can schedule time for a chat.
BIG LITTLE LEGENDS : The Forbes Interview
In a world of information overload and noise, it’s getting harder to stand out from the crowd. Whether you’re leading a team, running a company, or looking for your next career opportunity in a teeming marketplace, you’d better be thinking about brand. Your brand.
And remember this: People don’t buy products and services. They buy relationships, stories, and magic.
In managing your own career, of course, you are the product and you are the service. And, yes, you need to tell a good story and project a bit of magic.
A man who understands that better than most is Gair Maxwell, …. READ MORE
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The wheels of business turn faster each quarter and your company or industry association may be curious to explore enduring principles from the origin of legends. We know true and measurable value doesn’t occur from time on the stage, but the enduring IMPACT generated after the smoke clears and the dust settles. Timeless concepts that keep you ahead of that moving target called Relevance. If you have an in-person event coming up in 2025, you may want to consider offering the universally applicable message of BIG LITTLE LEGENDS.
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“Heroes get remembered. Legends never die” BABE RUTH.
yOUR BRAND. oN TRACK.
If now is an opportune time to discover the brand story and strategy uniquely your own, consider exploring a metaphorical road trip called THE BRANDING HIGHWAY. Designed for larger companies and organizations, our Executive Bootcamps serve as a journey and destination to help your brand emerge as an undeniable, undisputed, "Category of One.” Along the way, you will discover how to create substantial Differentiation and strategic Relevance while aligning your executive team. Impossible to describe with its many twists and turns, it helps to take a quick peek at this video:
“No one remembers who took second place. That will never be me." ENZO FERRARI
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